Pender’s Fabulous Journal of Random Stuff and Things!!!!

Teh essay of DOOM

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Body Buildin'

— Pender @ 13:58:51

I mentioned to some friends, the ones who actually read this blog when I post stuff to it, that I wrote something up about an initial workout routine for someone I know and they were mildly interested so I emailed it. Here’s the blog form, for the rest of the interweb to read. Copied from our facebook conversation.

It sort of gives a bit of background on where the guy is coming from. It’s just for his initial rampup tho, he’d add more excersizes, up the intensity and do some more trix once he got used to it. It also sounded like he was really interested in bulking up as well as slimming down, so it’d switch up quite a bit for the bulking phase. The immediate concern is that he’s overweight and from pictures he had a lot of fat stored on his shoulders, which is bad cause it’s hard on the heart.

Captain Anonymous
January 7 at 1:14pm
When i was at OAO, I weighed around 195. When I moved here in March I was up to 272. lol I am down to a “respectable” 255 now. I need to start working out, any suggestions?

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Pender Llama
January 7 at 1:23pm
Good lord yer gonna die! I’m a sensible 215 now, but I keep getting sick and various things get in the way that I really only work out one to two weeks in a month.

Less carbs, more proteins, if you can handle shakes replace a meal with a protein shake. No carbs after 6pm.

For working out, have you ever worked out before? Just not sure how detailed you need this to be. :)

Captain Anonymous
January 7 at 1:28pm
Yeah, I know I feel like I am gonna die somedays!!! lol How come you are getting sick anyway? Stress?

What do you eat in place of carbs? I am using for protein you are eating chicken and tuna?

I can handle shakes for sure. See, I usually only eat once a day. I grab a bag of chips at lunch and eat supper.

I have worked out before, but never “really” worked out. Know what I mean? What should I be doing to start? I don’t want to kill myself at first…

Pender Llama
January 7 at 2:28pm
Dunno why I’m getting sick, I assume it’s some undetected cancer. Or stress. Or just that I’ve become sickly in my old age.

Protein is meat, yep. :) hehe

For working out do a medium ramp-up since you had previously worked out. Go to the gym 5 days a week, 3 of those days do weight lifting, the other two are just pure cardio. Mon, wed, fri do weight lifting. Monday do chest and abs, wednesday do legs and shoulders, friday do back and arms. Each workout do 3 excersizes per bodypart and do 2 sets of each excersize, everything for 10 reps. NEVER go to failure, you should choose a weight that you CAN do like 2 more reps, but just don’t cause that’s the stuff that will make you sick in your first two weeks. Give yourself plenty of break, like 2-3 mins between sets. Drink a couple of gulps of water either after every set or every 2nd set. At the end of the workouts do 15 mins of cardio, your entire workout should never be more than 1 hour 15 mins, but preferably 1 hour exactly. On tuesday and thursday just do two cardio machines for 30 mins each, or 4 for 15 mins each, whatever it takes to keep you entertained.

Pre workout, if you can stomach it, have 1 packet of instant regular quaker oatmeal (put packet of oatmeal in bowl, boil water and pour enough in so it’s all floating, add some milk 1% or better, choke it down), and 30 mins before the workout have a protein shake. Immediately after your workout have a protein shake with 1-2 tablespoons of honey in it. If you work out in the evening, the “no carbs after 6pm” thing I said previously does NOT apply to your pre and post workout food, you need some carbs in ya to have the energy to move the weight and you need some protein to build/preserve muscle or you’re just wasting your time.

Part of your problem is that you aren’t eating enough and not frequently enough. When you don’t eat enough the body says “must store cause food supplies must be low” so whatever you eat, especially when it’s shit like chips which is all carbs and fat, you will store the living crap out of it all. Spread out like 6 small meals a day, minimum. A meal can be a tuna samich, egg samich, whatever. Try to eat a meal every 3 hours. You only need enough food to shut your brain up from saying “I’m hungry” for 3 hour intervals, which doesn’t take much. One of your meals a day can be the protein shake, just make sure the meal after that is a bit bigger than the others throughout the day.

If you don’t already, start taking a daily multivitamin. If you can find a version that does NOT have iron, you can take one before bed and one when you wake up. If you can only find brands that have iron, only take one a day when you wake up.

For protein shakes pick up a protein isolate. It’s nice and quick to get absorbed. A concentrate will be “ok” but the isolate is better for fat loss.

Chug water constantly throughout the day. In order for you to gain any benefit from anything you’re doing you need water. Enough water so that you’re just shy of making your stomach hurt.

Pender Llama
January 7 at 2:29pm
now I’m tired

Captain Anonymous
January 7 at 2:52pm
Wow, that is a lot of information. Is there certain kinds of protein powders that are better than others? Do you mix yours with water or milk? How come you can only take one vitamin a day if it has iron in it? Is that bad for you or something?

Yeah,I knew that I wasn’t eating enough and that it was part of my problem. I need to start eating better and more frequently for sure.

How the hell did you learn all this stuff???? Oh, and when do you think I will start to notice growth? Is it true what they say about the first 6 months, in that this is when you notice the most growth?

Pender Llama
January 7 at 3:13pm
This is a slim down routine I outlined, and really only for the ramp-up. The most noticable change should be fat loss for the first portion, building up is when your body is actually used to working out again so you don’t keep tossing your lunch after every workout. It’s true that you need a certain amount of fat in order to notice good muscle gains, but don’t worry, you’ll have enough left over even after the slimming down phase to work with. :)

I said protein isolate because it’s really quick to be absorbed, you could go with a concentrate but that’s not as “lean” or pure, it’s slower digesting and has fat in it, it just wouldn’t be as optimal. If you are rich you could buy a protein casein for bedtime, it’s really super slow digesting protein to last throughout the night so you don’t wake up STARVED to death every morning. It’s a bit expensive tho. Before bed you should take an omega 3-6-9 vitamin supplement pill as well, it slows your digestion rates while you sleep, though you may get fishy tasting burps. :P I mix my shakes with milk, just tastes better, though if you can stomach it with just water and you’re eating enough, water IS better. I said you could mix with 1% or better milk. Meaning 1% or skim.. hehe. Reason for it is that it doesn’t have much fat in it. A little fat is fine, too much fat isn’t.

Iron in your vitamin is bad because it actually causes oxidation in the body, which causes free radicals. Meaning, broken up dead material floating around in your blood stream, banging into stuff and causing trouble. If you eat meat, you don’t need to worry about not getting enough iron, you just have to worry about getting too much iron from the vitamin. It’d be pretty hard to near impossible to iron overdose from regular food so I wouldn’t worry about that side of things.

Learned from books, magazines and the interweb. I’ve got about 200lbs of magazines at the house. :P

You should see some obvious changes by 2 months, it’s possible to see something after a month but not real likely, if you have some side by side pictures you may, the changes would be subtle. After 6 months there should be some really significant changes. Take some before pictures and take some sporadic pictures throughout to validate the work you’re doing. Sometimes it feels like you’re not doing anything at all then a month later you get 8 compliments from different sources in a single day.

Captain Anonymous
January 7 at 3:35pm
Yeah, I think I have plenty of fat stored!!!! lol. I think I will take some pictures just to see where I stand after a few months. I know i need to do something. I feel like i am starting to gain weight again and I don’t want that!!! Should I use Creatine too?

Pender Llama
January 7 at 3:46pm
Creatine is a double edged sword. It makes you store water in muscle, true, and makes you stronger. However at first you need to slim down, because if you add weight to your muscle, with fat on top, you actually look fatter. :P It also makes you hold water in weird spots, like under your chin, making you look bigger. Plus you gain weight from water retention, so your scale may actually go up while you’re actually losing bodyfat but it’s just not immediately obvious. It’s really up to you, if you know and understand the pitfalls and can ignore them knowing you’re making progress, I’d say go for it. If you need to see the results more immediately to validate what you’re doing otherwise you’re going to be down on yourself and just stop, I’d say hold off at least a month or two. At minimum wait 2 weeks.. It’s moreso to push you past plateaus, which you will definitely not have reached in that short amount of time. No sense trying to push more when you’re just trying to push enough to get used to pushing. Say that a tongue twister hundred million times over!

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Tan Stimulant

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— Pender @ 15:33:04

Interesting article on New Scientist about something that would cause us to have a real tan. Tan in a bottle no longer washing off, and without the sun. It would actually be a REAL tan!

Pretty sure racism will be a thing of the past, since anyone will be able to have dark skin, and without all that pesky skin cancer and cataracts. Even red haired people. That’d be a cool looking combination.

Will also reduce the amount of time needed for pre-contest preperation in body building, not having to spend 20-40 mins each day for weeks in a tanning salon before a show. That stuff’s expensive and adds up fast.

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Mighty Mouses

Categories:

Body Buildin'

— Pender @ 17:29:02

Here’s an article about a drug that stops “Myostatin” in the body which helps you to produce more muscle. ~60% more muscle, without changing your normal life. Those mice got that in a MONTH! As I was reading the article I was thinking “man, that’d be so cool for bodybuilding, or even normal pencil necked geeks!” but then right in the article it has an entire paragraph about being “abused by athletes and body builders”. Friggin’ pencil-neck geek jerks. Apparently use of anything that works well is “abuse”, and takes away from curing people with legitimate need. Well sure, feed the muscular dystrophites first, but make enough for everyone else! I mean, this is american medicine, aren’t they just in it for the money anyhow? The answer is: yes.

Of course, if it makes my heart as large as a watermelon, maybe I won’t use it, at first.

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Pender’s Fabulous Journal of Random Stuff and Things!!!!

2009/1/8

Teh essay of DOOM

2006/9/21

Tan Stimulant

2005/12/9

Mighty Mouses

November 2009
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