At work, I checked a lotto ticket and it failed to win so I threw it in the garbage. The garbage cleaner guy (who looks like one of those creepy serial killer types) picked it up out of the garbage, looked at it for a while, saw that I hadn’t circled all the numbers on a single line, and threw it back into the garbage. Tomorrow if I don’t win I’m gonna circle them all on one line and see if he puts it into his pocket and just walks away.. or runs.
I just went on Shoutcast and noticed that in the Genre dropdown there is a new option: emo. I can’t actually connect to any of the stations at work, but I figure that’s ok, cause it would just make for a really emotional day at work. I just think it’s funny that whinerbitching is a genre. When I get home I’ll have to give it a good listen, for the purposes of comedy.
I should keep a running collection of stupid things indians say. At work (which I don’t usually talk about) we have some guys in india who are our counterparts, they work throughout the night (their day) and we work throughout the day (our hell). This is just a list of some of the stupid things they say pretty much on a daily basis, no matter how many times I tell them they sound stupid.
“Please do the needful.”
Translation: check this out for me?
“I have a doubt.”
Translation: I don’t know how this works.
“Few doubts…”
Translation: I really don’t know how this works.
“Can you please tell me know how exactally has to be done.”
Translation: what needs to be done?
“hamm…”
Translation: hmm
“Please suggest us.”
Translation: Can you please let us know what to do for this?
They also CAN NOT begin a conversation with you if they have not spoken to you within 15 minutes unless they say “hi pender” then wait for me to say “hi” then they say “how are you?” then wait for me to reply with “fine, how are you?” then they say “fine” then they tell me that we have some prod servers down. So no matter how much the sky is falling they can’t get me involved unless they know I’m fine and that I know they’re also fine. Stupid preamble.
At least this stuff gives me a frustrated chuckle every day..
Hollywood’s in Saint John visiting her momma and sister and various assorted other relatives and non-relatives, which gives me lots of time to think. One of the things I’ve been thinking about is fires. I’ve recently become a little paranoid of house fires, no real reason for it, I just think it would be freakin’ awful to lose everything we have.
So I checked it out, fire needs 3 things: oxygen, heat and a combustible source (such as wood, propaine, humans or cats). So my thinking is that if you get rid of oxygen, you get rid of the fire. Similar to how a fire extinguisher works, it’s this stuff you spray out that’s really cold and sucks up all the oxygen. That’s great, for small fires, what if you have a fire that’s already engulfed a room? You dump truckloads of water into the room.. Great, so now you have all your stuff burnt AND waterlogged.
So I’ve been working on a mechanism to put out house fires by sucking all the oxygen out of the building. It’s similar in concept to how a computer runs, you have this CPU that’s generating all this massive amount of heat, so you throw a heatsink on it, and a fan on top of that that blows air away from it, then you have fans all around the perimeter of your case shooting all the air in the case out (except 1 intake fan). In relation to a house, one way I was thinking about was somehow getting a blue tarp like thing (something a little less flammable than a normal blue tarp) around the building, then sucking the air out of the tarp with a few large fans around the perimeter. The problem I see with this is getting a tarp that is non-flammable enough to be able to put onto a burning house. Also getting the entire thing onto the house super fast (aside from using rockets) would be difficult.
So my latest evil fire suppressing idea is to get portable fans, one for each window. The fans are are sitting on the ground attached to a tube with a square window sized attachment. A person would put the window attachment over the window (it would have something on it to break the window) and this would let the fans suck the air out of the house.
Of course, you’d have to guarantee that there are no humans or other living creatures that you want to keep living running around inside your house, like rats or cockroaches.
Obviously fans aren’t high-tech enough, we’d have to use some sort of pump that would suck the air out of the house within seconds, rather than minutes. With no oxygen the fires should die quickly, and sucking all the air out would also get rid of most of the heat.
Now don’t go stealin’ me wonderful idear!
This article on cnn.com made me laugh on-line a few times, here’s my favorite line:
“It helps me to maintain my mobility as a physical problem but it also helps me to keep the pain at a distance so I can focus on my work,” MacLean told Reuters.
Hollywood sent me this, I thought it was pretty funny.
Warning: contains a copious amount of cats whose spelling and grammar is atrocious.
I saw this over on Steve’s blog and thought it was hilarious.
I wish I had an iPod so I could get this: IPod Toilet Paper Dispenser
Apparently scientists have been reading The Onion (or my articles) because I just found an article from a South-african based scientist that claims that rats and goldfish are smarter than dolphins.
Told ya.